Nothing Left to Lose Read online

Page 65

  Author: Kirsty Moseley

  I forced a smile even though my heart now hurt at the reminder. It seemed like I would never escape the fact that I was dirty and used, not even for a moment. “It’s alright. Don’t worry,” I lied.

  He grimaced and kissed the tip of my nose. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, kissing my nose.

  “Just forget it, it’s fine. ” I knew he hadn’t meant it that way at all, but it was just the reminder that hurt. I didn’t for a second think that he had meant to bring up Carter; it was just a joke than he hadn’t thought through. “Just for the record, I think you were incredible too, and I’ll never have better,” I said honestly. I knew that for a fact because I’d never have anyone else. I kissed him again, cuddling close to his side as I buried my face in his chest, breathing in his delicious smell. I instantly felt better. His body didn’t relax at my reassurances though. His muscles were still bunched; his arms were too stiff around me. I moved back, looking up to see his tense face. He was clearly angry with himself. Reaching out, I smoothed his frown line from his forehead. “It’s okay, I promise. ”

  He sighed heavily. “Man, I’m such a douchebag. I can’t believe I said that to you. ”

  I smiled. “Just forget it. I have. ” I decided then that I refused to think about anything bad after I had just had the most incredible sex ever. He rolled to his side so we were facing each other. His body was still tense, so I snuggled closer to him and kissed his lips softly. For a few minutes, we just lay there in silence, looking at each other as his fingers tickled up and down my spine. Finally, he spoke, “Thank you for today, I’ve honestly had the best birthday ever,” he said quietly.

  I smiled. “I had a great day too,” I replied. “Although I feel guilty because you’ve technically been working and couldn’t drink and stuff because I’m here. You really should have just come on your own; you would have had so much more fun. ”

  He shook his head in protest. “Baby Girl, you are what made my day great. I don’t care if I don’t drink,” he countered. I smiled and he leant forward, kissing me again hungrily. He moaned in the back of his throat and tightened his hold on me. Where we were pressed so tightly against one another, I could feel that he was starting to get excited again. I grinned against his lips, and he pulled back, smiling at me tenderly as he combed his fingers through my hair. “What’s funny?” he asked.

  “You’re like some kind of machine. It’s lucky we agreed on one night, and not one time, huh?” I teased, running my finger down his chest and raising one eyebrow when I got to his groin. He grunted, obviously shocked, but a slow smile spread across his face before he covered my mouth with his and we started all over again.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  I woke in the morning, n**ed and wrapped in his arms. He was stretched out behind me, spooning me. One of his hands rested on my hip, and the other was cupping my breast. The thought of being n**ed in his bed and us being in such an intimate position made a blush creep up onto my cheeks. Not that I had to worry about him seeing me n**ed though, after all, he’d probably kissed every inch of my body last night during the three times that we’d had sex.

  A satisfied smiled crept onto my lips. I refused to feel guilty about it today, I was entitled to one night of pleasure after the years of misery I’d had recently. I pressed myself back into his body, wanting to melt into him. I loved waking up next to him in the morning, he was so warm and comforting and the fact that he had never spent the night with another girl made me feel special.

  He moaned sleepily and wrapped his arms tighter around me, lazily kissing the back of my head. I turned my head to look at him, leaving my body pressed against his, not wanting him to let go yet.

  “Hi,” I murmured sheepishly.

  He grinned not making any moves to let go of me. “Hi. How are you feeling this morning?” He looked a little worried, as if he were waiting for a meltdown at any moment.

  “Happy and satisfied,” I confirmed, smirking at him.

  He burst out laughing and kissed my cheek. “Hmm, what a coincidence, me too. ” I felt a stirring against my thigh as he started to get excited again; he moved his h*ps away from me so that I didn’t feel it – the same as he usually did in the morning when it happened.

  I grinned and raised one eyebrow. “This could still count as last night if you want,” I suggested, wriggling back into his body and smiling at him over my shoulder. His erection prodded into the back of my leg, and my whole body seemed to thrum with excitement.

  He grinned. “Oh it can, can it? So, what you’re asking is if I want to have sex with you again. Hmm let me think,” he teased.

  I tried hard not to laugh. “Well if you don’t want me then…” I trailed off and scooted away from him.

  He gripped my h*ps tightly, thwarting my efforts to get away. “I never said that I didn’t want you. I don’t think I’ll ever say that, Baby Girl,” he whispered. His lips pressed against the back of my neck, his teeth nibbling gently and I felt goosebumps break out on my whole body. “Can you pass me a condom from the drawer?” he murmured, still kissing the base of my neck.

  I nodded quickly, scooting to the edge of the bed and pulling open the drawer where he’d got them from last night. The empty box stared back at me, taunting me. I groaned when I realised what that meant. “Damn it! There’s none left,” I whined. I felt so disappointed that I could cry.

  He pulled me back to him again. “I’ll go get one from Nate’s room, he didn’t come home last night so he won’t even know,” he said grinning. He pulled away from me and I whimpered at the loss of his contact, feeling empty and needy. He chuckled at my face and kissed my nose. “I’ll be right back, I promise. ”

  I watched as he jumped up and ran out of the room, butt naked. I laughed at how eager he was, he’d almost run into the door because he didn’t wait for it to open fully. He was back within about ten seconds and pounced on the bed, grinning.

  “I brought two, just in case, maybe, in a little while, that might count as last night too,” he explained, looking at me, hopefully holding up the two packets as evidence.

  “Don’t push your luck, Pretty Boy,” I teased, grinning.

  An hour and a half later, we were both exhausted. I flopped off him and lay on my back, trying to catch my breath. He rolled onto his side, moving closer to me, putting his arm over my stomach and nuzzling into my neck. I was sweating. My whole body felt weak and like I’d been on a thirty minute sprint. That last time was extremely tiring, and I could do with going back to sleep for a couple of hours.

  “So tell me, how come you’ll let me do that until I nearly pass out, yet I can’t run on the treadmill like I want to?” I asked, grinning.

  He bit my neck lightly. “Because I don’t get anything out of you running on the treadmill,” he joked, laughing.

  I laughed and slapped his hard chest playfully before rolling onto my side and sighing contentedly. “Thank you,” I said gratefully.

  He raised one eyebrow in question. “For what?”

  “For last night, well and this morning, that was the best night of my life. Thank you. ” I kissed his soft full lips, marvelling over how they seemed to be my exact match.

  “Well in that case, thank you for the best night of my life too, ma’am,” he replied, smiling at me.

  I groaned at the word ‘ma’am’. That word from his lips did strange things to my insides. “Ashton, don’t keep calling me that. My body is already aching all over, I can’t go again,” I whined.

  “Well, maybe later,” he shrugged, looking at me hopefully.

  I winced at his expression, praying that this didn’t ruin our friendship because I needed him in my life. “Ashton, we agreed…” I trailed off uncomfortably.

  He sighed. “I know. I had to try though, right?” He kissed the tip of my nose. “You want me to run you a bath, and I’ll make breakfast for when you get out?” he offered. He glanced
over at the clock and laughed. “Well, actually it’ll be lunch,” he corrected.

  I smiled at how thoughtful and generous he was. “Sure, that’d be great,” I answered, biting my lip at how adorable he was. He certainly was going to make someone incredibly happy one day. The thought made me so jealous that it actually hurt. He looked me over slowly and laughed at something. “What?” I asked curiously.

  He shook his head and climbed out of the bed; he pulled on his jeans and made his way to the bathroom. I winced and bit my lip when I saw he had some red scratches on his back. I could hear water running, so I got out of the bed and stretched my tight muscles; it genuinely did feel like I had been working out.

  When I looked in his mirror, I gasped. “Holy shit!” I cried, as I looked at the red marks on my neck and breasts. Immediately, Ashton ran back into the room, looking around worriedly. “Ashton, seriously, what the hell?” I asked, rubbing the marks as if they would come off.

  He laughed and wrapped his arms around me. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise I did it. I guess I got a little carried away,” he explained, grimacing.

  I laughed and slapped his arm. “A little carried away? There are five hickeys on me!” I scolded, laughing incredulously.

  “Six actually. I’ve just seen another one on your cute, little butt,” he stated, slapping my behind gently. I gasped and turned to look in the mirror and sure enough, there was another hickey on my butt cheek.

  I giggled. “Well, at least I can cover that one up. ”

  He grinned sheepishly. “Sorry. ”

  I rolled my eyes and pushed him away gently. “Go turn off the bath, Pretty Boy, before your apartment floods,” I suggested, grinning. He jumped like he’d forgotten it and ran out of the room quickly. He called me in there after a couple of minutes, and when I walked in I saw that he’d drawn me a bubble bath. I couldn’t hold the little ‘aww’ that escaped my lips as my heart skipped a beat at the thoughtfulness of him. I climbed in and sighed as my strained muscles started relaxing. I closed my eyes and replayed some of the memories of last night; I had a feeling I would be revisiting those memories a lot.